It seems I am quite clumsy sometimes. I regularly make silly mistakes which I wonder how on earth I actually managed to make. Apparently people with Asperger’s are clumsier than most ‘normal’ people. Maybe it’s something to do with a lack of depth perception, maybe it’s because I’m usually engrossed in whatever I happen to be thinking about at the time. Maybe it’s because I can only deal with one thing at a time and everything else is like white noise to me. Whatever it is, here are some of my strangest and oddest (and perhaps funny) clumsy moments.

– When brushing my teeth, my hand sometimes ‘slips’ causing the toothbrush to exit my mouth and hit me elsewhere on my face. Most recently I poked myself in the eye with it.

– Stairs…I am constantly reaching the bottom step knowing that it’s the last one only for my brain to panic, thinking there must be another one, and I end up stumbling.

– The amount of times I have fallen going UP the stairs is unbelievable.

– I regularly bump into things; tables, chairs, people, doors, lamp posts. It’s not that I don’t know they are there, it’s just that I can’t seem to walk past them without hitting them.

-It baffles me why people want to walk arm in arm with me or holding hands as I am unable to walk in a straight line when in close proximity to someone else. I veer into and away from them as if I’m not sure which direction we’re going in.

– I throw food over people more often that is deemed average. My son must think I hate him because of the amount of times I’ve tried to feed him dinner only for the food to ‘fall’ off the spoon and onto his lap or his face. Several times I’ve dropped food onto myself. I’ve poured sugar on my face, dropped scrambled egg down the inside of my t-shirt, spilled beans from on hand onto the other, my clothes are covered in various stains from spilled lunches.

– I drop things a lot. I can be carrying an item and just drop it accidentally. When passing items to people they end up on the floor. Several times someone has given me an item only for it to bounce straight out of my hands. Three times in one day I dropped the same pen down the back of the radiator.

– My throwing skills aren’t the best. I can take me several attempts to throw a ball high enough to go over a wall because my fingers have turned to jelly.

– When walking I often trip over my own feet, because years of practice wasn’t enough apparently

– Once I decided to try out a fitness group. We were doing some throwing and catching with a soft ball when I caught my fingernail on one of my fingers attempting to catch the ball. Blood poured everywhere and it took ages to heal. Who knew you could do so much damage with a ball made out of sponge?

– I have hit people a fair few times. Not on purpose. Either attempting to get past them, give them something, take something off them or trying to help them with something my arms have gone wide and accidentally hit the person. Very embarrassing

So all in all I am quite clumsy. It’s a wonder they let me out at all!

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I am a 33 year old non-binary PDAer with 3 kids. I love food, gin, books, socks, DS games, and writing about PDA. My fav colour is purple and my fav animals are Dragons. I prefer the countryside, autumn/winter, walking, swimming and squash.

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